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Thursday, January 13, 2005 

i write what I feel!

I just did my third exam but I think these feelings needs to be said before I get more stress of whther failed or passed the exam!

My flatmate has been blaming me for being cold about going to vote, now he is been even accusing me of being a lazy arse and careless regarding his nations fate!
now these are my flashbacks when I think about ticking any List:
- M.K.Ataturk, Lausane treaty, and denying Kurds to have their own country!
- Turks, Persians and Arabs still kicking our arses!
- King mahmood Vs Brits war and the creation of Iraq
- Iraq the arabic country
- around a century's truggle for what?
- another Iraq was toppled but now forming a new one by MY HANDs
- vote for Arab nationalists or Islamists to kick my childrens arse once again
- 4M against 20M what are we capable of?
- what is the difference between having 50 chairs or 20 Chairs for Kurds?
- every single parliament meeting will be a disaster for kurdish MPs!
- I dont know any of those whom I vote for?
- our damaged house in the chemical raid of 16th of March 88 is still as it is!
- Baghdad, where they took us by the private buses towards Kwait at the anfal campaign
- Allawi, the bathist veteran
- Alyawar the tribe-head
- Americans standing there and let Arabs (Binladen Guys) do whatever they like
- Americans watching Kurds live the scars of Weapons of Mass killings continue persecute Kurds
- Kirkuk and other persecutions we still live, after OUR LIBERATION
- the Arab League, Iraq is still a member of that funny league
- I still remember shouting at us byt the green iraqi soldieures: "inzil gawad" (get off the car, you pimp)
- they call us in Arabic "akrad" (Kurds) (the plural exceptional form for any noun in Arabic refers to its weakness or being a foreign name), they still cant say Kurd just as they call Arab
- sh**, enough compulsory voting for others, I want a country, too!
- hell of other stuff!

I just cant figure out my head to spend, my precious time, to go and vote for ppl that I dont know what they are capable of?
As i heard in an old american film a deaf,dumb girl was writing:
"If I am to be silent then let me be silent as the hills, so that at least i can echo whatever I hear and like the most, let me echo my heart which says: I hate being Iraqi, I AM NOT ONE"

I think that is it for now, I need time to think about this, I hope my nation is not being betrayed like the past rounds!

i just have to add this to it:
I just read a short interview with a PDK politician let me say, or actually a commander, he says:
"this is the contiuity of the struggle we started in the 20s"!....I dont know how?
"everything will be done in Iraq by agreements, but we still have to be more in the parliament" .. I thought that was an answer to one of my flashbacks but then I really cant figure this out! please help!!
"those who hate us, kurdish parties go and vote for your nation"...but Sir I dont feel like my nation is very happy with this! You will see the results of the unofficial referendum!
"those who are not sue for some reasons, will go and vote on that day "... really?
"we can make alliances with other sides in Iraq" .... can you? or they just needed the Kurds as you say when they were fleeing Saddam?
"Shia are the majority" .... so is it not better to seek other solutions that taking us to the ballots? we know this Sir!

that didnt help me much either!

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